About the author: Dan Cannon is the CTO of Nicasio Design. Follow Dan on Twitter.
I would wager that by now you have at least heard about the Chuck Norris facts floating around the Internet. I ran across some tech related ‘Facts’ the other day and this inspired me to write some Chuck Norris WordPress/Web Design Facts.
Facts after the break.
Chuck Norris WordPress/Web Design Facts
- Chuck Norris doesn’t use plugins. He roundhouse kicks the core until it does what he wants.
- Chuck Norris is GPL compliant.
- Chuck Norris’s WordPress theme is just a picture of his beard. It won 12 Webby Awards and was deemed “Best Theme of All Time”.
- Chuck Norris can’t make core contributions. Unfortunately, there is no way to store a roundhouse kick on a filesystem.
- Chuck Norris doesn’t care about SEO. He’s already #1 for the keywords: pain, no mercy, roundhouse, and unicorns.
- Chuck Norris’s tag cloud only has 3 words, all in large, bold font: beard, roundhouse, pain
- Chuck Norris CAN use the_content() outside of the loop.
- Chuck Norris can host WordPress without a database, server, or domain name.
- Chuck Norris wrote a plugin once. It was called “Roundhouse Kick”. It had to be removed from the repository due to the number of fatalities.
- Chuck Norris doesn’t write his own blog posts as the human mind cannot comprehend the thoughts of Chuck Norris
- Chuck Norris is 100% cross browser compliant, including IE6.
- Chuck Norris regularly uses infinite loops – on purpose – without breaking his site.
- Chuck Norris tried using WordPress.com once on 2/18/2010. The system could not handle his beard and was unavailable for 110 minutes.
- Chuck Norris doesn’t use Askimet or CAPTCHAS. He uses roundhouse kicks and punches for spam control.
- Chuck Norris only has 1 category on his blog – pain.
- Chuck Norris codes in PHP (plentiful helpings [of] pain) and CSS (cascading systematic slaps)
- Chuck Norris doesn’t follow W3C Standards. Chuck Norris IS a W3C Standard.
- Chuck Norris uses Comic Sans for content – And no one is going to say a damn thing about it.
Feel free to leave your WordPress/Web Design Chuck Norris facts in the comments below.